Fantasia Barrino & the Gay Pilgrim

Posted on May 26, 2004

I have mixed feelings about reality TV, as I’m sure many others do. Some shows like Colonial House and Mad Mad House have caught my attention because the subject matter interested me, but most of them just use real people in ridiculously manipulated experiences that defy reality. I used to feel that way about American Idol as well, but that show has finally produced a unique voice that totally justifies its existence – Fantasia Barrino.

I’ve enjoyed her voice since her initial audition with the three judges, each week delighting that she was moving forward in the competition. Unlike past American Idol finalists, Barrino has a unique sound that is unlike most everyone else in pop music today. Usually, America seems to prefer the expected and uninteresting in their pop stars, but this time it would seem that raw talent and distinctiveness might actually win in the end. Even so, I voted successfully 5 times last night for Fantasia, Ms. Barrino if you’re nasty.

Did anyone else watch Colonial House out there? I know PBS is usually no major Neilsen magnet, but someone out there besides the Beeb have to produce the shows that will eventually be re-run on the cable learning channels. Anyway, Colonial House is essentially a show where real people are shipped off to live like colonists from the 1600’s in America. The producers, also responsible for Frontier House, have strived to be as true to the period as possible, from the clothing to the social structure to the strident laws on behaviour. One unexpected surprise was the coming out of Jonathon, the servant of the colony’s lay preacher. At first this reminded me of the expected gay guy in the early Real World shows, but the producers tastefully wove this into the comparison between 17th-century and 21st-century mindsets.

Tonight, I finish both American Idol and Colonial House and ceremoniously wipe them from my ReplayTV. With Alias over until 2005, Sopranos and Deadwood coming to an end soon, and these shows over tonight, my TV watching will finally quiet down again. Too bad the summer movie season starts this weekend. Oy!

Super Mario Sunshine

Posted on October 01, 2002


Tired of punching, kicking, and slashing your way through life?

Sick of collecting gil, munny, rupees, and other various nonsensical currencies?

Fed up with stabbing octoroks, impaling malboros, and carjacking innocent people?

If so, then Super Mario Sunshine is for YOU!

Playing SMS reminded me of those summer afternoons when I’d spend hours hosing down anything that didn’t scream obsenities back. There’s just an inherent smile that rushes across your face as you spread moisture to the various trees, piles of dirt, cobwebs, ducks, etc. that you encounter in your average backyard. SMS captures that perfectly, allowing you to distribute H2O to all of creation while doling out some justice to the wicked (well, in this case, dirty).

When I first read about the new Super Mario game and saw pictures of our beloved, Italian protagonist with a bulky water-spewing device strapped firmly to his back, I was in shock! I wanted Mario to fly through the air, unfettered by bulky objects, via any of his previous devices (his cape, his flying hat, or even his Tanuki suit)! And though the worlds of SMS would be gorgeous to observe from high up in the air, doing so would probably spoil (or at least significantly shorten) an otherwise joyous game (did I mention that you get to shoot water at everything?!).

Though many of my favorite Mario items (Goombas, Fire Plants, Stars, Tanuki suits) have been left behind, at least a few new items have been thrown in (nozzles, shines, durians). This combined with the search for yellow, blue, and red coins provides MUCH to do throughout the adventure. Be warned, though. SMS can be incredibly frustrating at times. Playing video games should be a relaxing endeavour, but there were moments when I wanted to fling my SMS disc out the window to see how far it would go. 4 words – red coin warp zones!

Overall, if you’ve enjoyed any of the Mario games previously, then give Super Mario Sunshine a chance. You might even find yourself wandering aimlessly around a world admiring the beauty of the water and rediscovering the joy of making things get wet!

Scooby Doo: the Movie

Posted on June 19, 2002


This past Friday, I had the displeasure of witnessing the Harry Potter-ization of the generally enjoyable cartoon Scooby Doo. To clarify, I’d like to define “Harry Potter-ization” as the literal translation of some medium into a movie without making the creative effort to make it an enjoyable movie. This was previously done in the Harry Potter movie (also distributed by Warner Bros.) when Chris Columbus was so beholden to J.K. Rowling’s text that he sacrificed modern movie pacing in order to keep the myriad of fanatical fans from saying ‘they didn’t include X’. The makers of Scooby Doo suffered from the same malady but with a more horrendous result. While Harry Potter and the Sorceror’s Stone is still a tolerable movie for its visuals, acting, and atmosphere, Scooby Doo’s only worthwhile contribution to my life were the brief moments of classic Shaggy & Scooby goodness and, finally, the end credits!

Another problem with this film was the target audience. While I understand that Scooby Doo is basically a kid’s cartoon, I don’t think that the kids of today are too knowledgeable of the many adventures of Scooy Doo. I would guess that the majority of Scooby Doo fans are in their 20’s and 30’s by now, so why then would the producers compose a film that contained an unbearable belch/fart scene that would only appeal to younger kids? And if their target audience was indeed younger kids, why would the sprinkle pot jokes, sexual innuendo, and stylistic references from the cartoons that would likely only appeal to a more mature audience? Some films do succeed at appealing to several audiences at once by being layered with different kinds of humor. A kid can appreciate the slapstick of a Mel Brooks film without understanding the sexual humor that would appeal to adults. Unfortunately, in Scooby Doo, the attempts at layering were obvious and painful to both kid and grown-up alike.

As this movie made just over 50 million in its opening weekend, I’m quite sure these lifeless copies of our beloved cartoon characters will be dragged out again on another zany adventure. Let’s just hope that the studios bring in some real talent that will transform Scooby Doo into more of a cinematic mountain than this direct-to-video molehill.

The Legend of the Rangers

Posted on January 20, 2002

The Legend of the Rangers is an all-new story from the universe of Babylon 5, with all of the benefits and problems there-in. While I love Babylon 5 for its epic scope and timeless message, I loathe Babylon 5 for its sometimes cheesy dialogue and over-the-top acting. The Legend of the Rangers succeeds and fails in all of these aspects. There are moments where my heart pounds with excitement, and there are moments where my mouth drops in disbelief – did he ACTUALLY just SAY that horrible line???!?!

But for all this, I must forgive JMS (the writer/creator of B5). His influences include the greats of sci-fi/fantasy (Tolkein, Asimov, Clarke, Herbert) along with the greats of literature (Tolstoy, Dickens, Dostoevsky), so its not surprising to find elements in his writing that remind or even reference their works (for better or worse). An in the genre television industry, literary allusions can be a pleasant rarity, indeed!

Specifically about this movie, I loved the return of Christopher Franke’s music (they tried out a VERY different composer in short-lived Crusade series), the much-improved CG (computer graphics that rival anything else on TV budgets), and the good blend of action, political plotting, and character-driven moments. From what I’ve seen thus far, this collection of characters and situations warrants repeated viewings and a regular t.v. show (which Sci-Fi plans to go ahead with if the movie does well). The same cannot be said of most of the shows on TV today.

Top 10 Movies of 2001

Posted on January 04, 2002

1) The Lord of the Rings

Several years back just after the release of Star Wars: Episode I, I remember hearing of a somewhat obscure director from New Zealand who wanted to make a fantasy trilogy that would demonstrate to George Lucas exactly how epic fantasy filmmaking should be done. With the release of Fellowship of the Ring, Peter Jackson has elevated the definition of excellence in fantasy/sci-fi cinema to a new height against which Lucas must struggle to reach.

But I liked Phantom Menace, didn’t I? After reflecting back on that film, I now realize that it failed in a lot of important ways that the Fellowship of the Ring succeeded in. While Phantom Menace drops us headfirst into conflict without much introduction, Fellowship succeeds in drawing us into the lives of Hobbits, Elves, Wizards, and Humans. Where Phantom washes us over with plasticky landscapes and just-out-of-the-box droids, Fellowship immerses us with vibrant country sides and well-worn battle armor. And when a major character falls in Phantom, I felt only a bit of sadness that one of the cooler characters wouldn’t be around in the next two films, where in Fellowship I was shedding tears for the loss of a friend.

What else did I like about Fellowship? All of the actors were fantastic! The score to the film was breathtaking! The visual effects were gorgeous and seamless with the naturally beautiful landscapes and sets behind them. Unlike Harry Potter & The Sorcerer?s Stone, the troll in Fellowship actually looked realistic and scary! The costumes and buildings were absolutely convincing. At no time during the film was I even slightly distracted by disbelief in the fact that I was watching Middle Earth.

To me, Fellowship was a movie made out of love and respect by skillful people who honestly care about their product. Peter Jackson skillfully directed these people into making a film that sets new technical standards, honors the legacy of Tolkein, and can stand up on its own as a work of art. Very few filmmakers have accomplished that much in their entire careers! Eleven months is going to be a quite a wait, but what a great event to look forward to!!

2) Amelie

Amelie is a beautiful and highly idiosyncratic film about the joys of anonymous acts of compassion. Amelie finds both delight and emptiness in these acts as she attempts to fill an emotional void in her life. Her struggle is at times comical, cynical, and always magical. Written and directed by the French filmmaker Jean-Pierre Jeunet, the director of the bizarre Delicatessen and delightful City of Lost Children, Amelie succeeds in being both idyllic and ironic, boastful and bashful, saccharine and sarcastic. It’s an uplifting work of cinema without the shmaltz and fluff that Hollywood routinely cranks out as “feel-good” films. Unfortunately, until it wins some Oscar nominations for best foreign-language film, you probably won’t find it at your local multiplex. But dig hard for a good theater, and you might just find yourself blessed.

3) Moulin Rouge

Moulin Rouge is a musical unlike any you’ve ever seen – a fantastic journey through bohemian 19th-century Paris as retold with the pop songs of the 20th century. Sounds confusing? It can be, both visually and aurally unsettling at times, but only as a vehicle to guide the audience along a classic tale of star-crossed lovers. Don’t watch it expecting historical accuracy. Don’t be surprised if you’re laughing and crying at the same time. And don’t be surprised if you find yourself singing along!

4) the Others

Never has so innocent a force as light been so terrifying! The Others, the first American film by Spanish director Alejandro Amenabar, is a classical horror film set in an old mansion off the coast of Great Britain during the end of the second World War. From the beginning of the film, Amenabar suggests hidden horrors lurk right around the corner…or perhaps in the next room, which because of the children’s unexplained aversion to light, is always unseen behind a locked door or drawn curtain.

If this were all there were to the film, I’d still probably be raving about it. But the true genius of the Others lies in its two layers of perception. To say any more would be sacrilege and would ruin whatever chance you have of experiencing both layers, but this is a film that you simply must see more than once. And for added entertainment, make your second trip to the theater with someone who hasn’t seen it yet.

5) Monsters, Inc.

6) Memento

A remarkable concept film that succeeds in depicting the protagonist’s affliction by unravelling the story from the end to the beginning. Starring Guy Pierce (who I LOVED in Priscilla, Queen of the Desert), Memento suceeds in keeping the audience guessing until the very end, or rather beginning. I’ve heard that when starting a story, you should grab the audience with something outlandish. Memento uses this technique quite effectively with the protagonist killing someone in the first few minutes of the movie. But that’s only the destination…the journey is what keeps us involved and intrigued.

7) Vanilla Sky

8) the Man Who Wasn’t There

9) AI

I have a special place on my shelf for my three favorite Kubrick films – Dr. Strangelove, 2001, and a Clockwork Orange – which, for me, represent the best work of an amazing film-maker. When A.I. is released, it will sit proudly next to those movies as both an epilogue to Kubrick’s career and an homage from one auteur to another. A.I. is an attempt to blend the idiosyncratic and sometimes anaseptic film-making of Kubrick with the epic and emotional film-making of Speilburg. This attempt, however, is not always successful. The opening story of the young robot trying to fit into a family seems at times too cold to make us care about the future of these characters. Later, when the young robot reacts to finding out that he isn’t as unique as he thought, we lose yet another layer of empathy for him.

Many people have said that they felt the film should have ended twenty minutes early without the final epilogue. I can’t agree on the basis that Kubrick was quite fond of having a coda at the end of his work, and he did in fact approve of the ending before he put the project away. Speilburg’s handling of the coda, likewise, was brilliant. Not giving too much away, but finding a resolution to the film that was both poignant and fulfilling, scientific and fantastic.

Overall, Speilburg did an overall good job at brining one final Kubrick film out to the world. He absolutely nailed Kubrick’s style in the clinic, Rouge City, and frozen city scenes. Perhaps if more of Speilburg had involved, this film would have been a perfect blend of genius. Instead, we’re left with an highly above-average work that can’t quite figure out its identity.

10) Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back

Play by Moby

Posted on September 01, 2000

It’s rare these days to find an artist whom I admire for both their music and their ideology. Moby is such an artist. I had first heard of Moby a few years back from some friends as the “iconoclastic Christian, Vegan D.J.” With such a rare combination of ideas, I decided to give Moby a listen. At that point in my life, I wasn’t ready for what I heard. But then again, neither was the commercial world.

Now, everywhere you turn, you hear Moby, whether you realize it or not. Even now as I’m writing this review, I am listening to Moby’s “Porcelain” playing on a commercial for something or other. Moby’s music can also be heard on an especially poiant episode of the X-Files. And, of course, everyone’s heard his biggest hits “Bodyrock” and “Natural Blues” on the radio now and again. So why is it that now, after many years of toiling for his art in the clubs, has Moby finally achieved mass commercial success?

Now is the era of the DJ’s in the popular music scene. Those meta-artists who remix and reinvent the sounds and samples of music gone by into something not wholly new but fantastically original. And Moby is, arguably, their king. A legend among DJ’s and auteurs alike, Moby stands out as a man of both musical and spiritual integrity. He represents a fusion of the spirit and technology, and this can be seen clearly in Play. In this album, Moby draws upon spirituals and organic textures to spin a wholistic, electronic masterpiece. It may be meta-music, having been formed of others art, but it achieves that which other DJ’s and electronic musicians fail to achieve – the conveyance of the spiritual and soulful in a medium of 1’s and 0’s – the continuous in the realm of the discrete – conjuring a ghost from the machine and allowing her to sing.

The Book of the Long Sun by Gene Wolfe

Posted on September 01, 2000

Gene Wolfe is the finest writer of modern, American literature alive today. Period. This is a statement of reality that scholars are slowly coming to realize, as they did in the early days of Tolkein, Lewis, Clarke, and Herbert (among many others). In less than a century, Wolfe’s Book of the New Sun, Book of the Long Sun, and Book of the Short Sun will stand out with Tolkein’s Lord of the Rings and Herbert’s Dune series as the most important epics of science fiction ever written.

I have just completed reading the New Sun and the Long Sun series for the second time. Even still, I find myself needing to go back and reread passages a dozen times to extract all the subtle meanings and allusions that Wolfe throws out. Long Sun is especially dense because of the immense cast of priests, gods, robots, thieves, soldiers, and whores that comprise its dramatis personae. Thankfully, Wolfe has provided a listing of the characters and brief descriptions in each book. Even so, navigating the sometimes seemingly capricious narrative flow seems an impossible challenge. But it can be done and even enjoyed. And it is soooo worth it!!

Long Sun deals with the story of a generation starship and it’s “cargo” of “bios” and “chems” on their way to another world. In this “whorl” inside the starship, a religion has been established in which the people pray and sacrifice animals to the “gods” who built and run the whorl. This system seems to be running well until the real God enlightens a local augur to seek out the truth beyond the whorl. It is this priest’s saga that plays out in the Long Sun books (Nightide, Lake of the, Calde of the, and Exodus from the Long Sun).

Wolfe examines themes of religion, spirituality, war, and destiny in this epic work. This alone would not distinguish Wolfe from the myriad of other authors who have dealt with similar themes. It is, however, Wolfe’s amazing style and command of mythology and mysticism that truly establish Wolfe as the imminent author of science fiction today. Now, I’m looking forward to digging in to the sequel series Book of the Short Sun. I’m sure that I won’t be disappointed.

The Crocodile Hunter

Posted on September 01, 2000

Wow…Steve Irwin has lived a life often dreamed of but rarely realized. Not only has he braved the wilds of nature and the animal kingdom, but he has a successful and award-winning set of series that have established him as the new generation’s Jack Henna. If you haven’t had the pleasure of watching Steve and his family brave snakes, crocodiles, and reptiles (oh my), then run to your nearest cable box and tune in to Discovery or Animal Planet. Just be careful not to get too brazen in your own encounters with nature after watching, tempting though it may be.

Post by Bjork

Posted on July 01, 2000

It’s rare these days to find an artist who’s unique in style and commercially successful. Bjork is one such artist who’s early endeavors with electronica paved the way for the modern renaissance of synthetic music. Bjork started out early in her teens performing with the Sugar Cubes, a punk-rock group from her native Iceland. Her frenetic voice fit well around their eclectic style, but circumstances eventually demanded that she discover her own sound.

I bought her first album Debut back in 1993 when I was astounded by her trippy debut video for “Human Behaviour.” However, after listening with my then young ears to the album, I quickly abandoned it as another weird alternative album. Six years later, I would realize my mistake.

I rediscovered Bjork this past year when I bought her latest album Homogenic (see review). Post is Bjork’s second album and was released way back in 1995, but I only became interested in it after listening to some tracks that I found on Napster. Most noteworthy on this album areHyper-ballad“, “It’s Oh So Quiet”, “Isobel” and “I Miss You.” Each of these songs demonstrate Bjork’s superior musicianship and stylistic originality. They also range across a wide musical spectrum from quiet ballads to frenetic revelries to a coy big band chart. In fact, Post outdoes Homogenic in better capturing how diverse and creative Bjork truly is.

I must confess that not everyone will care for Bjork’s voice. But if you feel a bit daring, go out and give Bjork a chance.

The Language Instinct by Stephen Pinker

Posted on July 01, 2000

Have you ever wondered about how children pick up language so quickly? Or about how our minds seem totally adept at processing and generating meaningful sounds that others understand? We often take the gift of language for granted as it requires little or no thought for most of us to carry on a conversation. Steven Pinker, a leading researcher in the field of cognitive sciences, attempts to understand and explain this process to the layperson and scientist alike. The Language Instinct is a wonderfully enlightening book, full of examples, theory, and colorful anecdotes that will leave you hungry to learn more about the exciting field of linguistics.

Good vs. Evil

Posted on July 01, 2000

Good vs. Evil (aka. GvsE) is the best show that you’ll probably never see on television. That’s because, as of two weeks ago, that on-again-off-again champion of original genre programming the SciFi Channel canned what is probably the funniest, most original show on television. What’s so insane about their decision isn’t that Good vs. Evil didn’t have the ratings to warrant keeping the show – it quite frankly wasn’t doing too hot. What’s so insane is that Good vs. Evil actually ranked higher than several other shows that the SciFi Channel have decided to renew. Two shows in particular come to mind – Lexx and First Wave. Both are abysmal, horribly written pieces of excrement that shouldn’t even be aired against the infomercials at 2:00am on Sunday morning! But they were both renewed for additional seasons, to sit comfortably beside the glorious sci-fi epic series Farscape.

But what’s Good vs. Evil about anyway? In style, Good vs. Evil is comparable to the buddy-detective shows of the 1970’s, mixed with Touched by an Angel and tons of great lines and cool characters. Chandler Smythe, a slain journalist is brought back to life to fight in the Lord’s ongoing war against the Devil. This spiritual war is fought between the Corp., a pseudo-FBI of ass-kicking agents, and the Morlocks, a underworld organization of demons out to take your soul. The agents of the Corp. are all given a second chance on life in fighting against evil; however, many of them find it difficult to abide by the rules of the Corp. First, they cannot contact family members or friends from their previous life. Second, they are forbidden ANY sexual contact. If they serve the Corp. faithfully, they will eventually be allowed into heaven. But if any of them break these rules or drop out of service, it’s a guaranteed one-way ticket down into Hades.

Whew…there are a lot of things that Good vs. Evil needs improvement on. However, as with most other shows, time must be given for the cast and writers to find their own niche and perfect it. Look at any successful show – Seinfeld, Buffy, X-Files, Simpsons, Farscape, Babylon 5, etc – all mostly sucked their first seasons on the air. Thankfully, some network execs had faith in each of those shows to let them survive into at least a second season. I sincerely believe that we’ll see less and less quality programming as the new network execs have less and less patience with new shows. If a new show doesn’t hit the ground running in under three episodes, bang, they’re gone! And with them go the future of the medium…

Gladiator

Posted on July 01, 2000

More often than not, two things happen to me when I go to see a movie I’ve heard good things about. The first is that my expectations are WAY too high, and the movie never measures up to how good I thought the movie would be. The second is that if I do love the film to death, most of my friends and family won’t care too much for it at all, leaving me to feel isolated and freakish in my cinematic tastes. However, with Ridley Scott’s latest epic Gladiator, both of these familiar expressions of Murphy’s laws of movie enjoyment fail miserably! :-)

Not only did I thoroughly enjoy this remarkably well-directed/well-acted/well-scored film, but most everyone I talked with ALSO loved it. That’s quite a feat, to make a summer action flick that appeals to everyone, on many levels of analysis. And if anyone has deserved this, it has been Ripley Scott. His films often reach up to the lofty heights of pure art, but always try to stay rooted in a mass-market appeal. More times than not, however, this has failed, leaving behind either cult-masterpieces like Blade Runner and Legend or crappy, moronic studio films like 1492 and G.I. Jane.

I’m not going to say too much about Gladiator’s story so that nothing will be spoiled. I will say, however, that Russell Crowe is an imminently distinguished actor who’s previous efforts (L.A. Confidential, the Insider, Mystery Alaska) all show sparks of greatness. But in Gladiator, Crowe gets to let loose as the ultimate action hero – a gladiator! But he’s not your father’s gladiator to be sure, as contrasted with Kurt Douglas and Charleton Heston. Rather, Crowe portrays both the warrior and the family man, a man of principle and courage in a time where society had neither.

Go out and watch Gladiator while you still can see it in a big-screen theater. Then, after reflecting on the movie, go out and buy the beautiful soundtrack that Lisa Gerard and Hans Zimmer wrote for it. You’ll thank me later…

The Heat by Toni Braxton

Posted on May 01, 2000

After hearing Toni Braxton is releasing her new album, The Heat, I decided that the next two reviews of music would center on the new album. Toni is the flyest of the fly, but don’t mistake Toni Braxton for just another pretty face. Under the tutelage of producers Antonio “L.A.” Reid and Kenneth “Babyface” Edmonds, Braxton faced down a tide of nasty New Jacks and Jills and helped preserve R&B as a bastion of soulful, emotional balladry. And though she’s but one among many through which the multitalented Face speaks, Braxton has been able to interject plenty of her own personality into the mix. On her debut she was the shy ing?nue (a preacher’s kid, after all), and sang mostly dejected love songs such as the smash hits “Breathe Again,” “Another Sad Love Song,” “Seven Whole Days,” and “Love Shoulda Brought You Home.” Four years and 11 million records sold later, the shy preacher’s daughter was bustin’ out, both of her clothes at various awards shows and in magazines (demolishing her laid-back image). After only a pair of albums, Braxton is already at the top of her game, and it’ll likely be a long time before she has any reason to look down.} Source: MusicHound R&B: The Essential Album Guide. Look for The Heat to burn down stand s on April 25, 2000.

Edith’s Diaryby Patricia Highsmith

Posted on May 01, 2000

Patricia Highsmiths’ Edith’s Diary is truly an adventure into emotions twining in great writing technique. Exploration into the human physique, in an unconventional passionate way, is told through Edith’s Diary. Highsmith is quick to pick up on human feelings and is able to set forth writing that blends skill into pure art. In the book, Edith Howland is dealing with a troublesome son and failed marriage. As Edith’s life becomes harsh, her diary entries only become brighter and brighter. She invents a happy life. As she knits for imaginary grandchildren, the real world recedes. Her descent into madness is subtle, appalling, and entirely believable. Moreover, Highsmith has created a further memorable character than Tom Ripley.

Gladiator: Original Soundtrack

Posted on May 01, 2000

If you know even a small variety of unusual artists, you’ll probably flip like I did when you read you wrote the soundtrack to Ridley Scott’s upcoming epic movie Gladiator. Hans Zimmer is a usual enough choice for an epic, action film, but what about sharing the byline with a former member of the eclectic, folk group Dead Can Dance??? Well, it’s not without precedence.

Recently, Lisa Gerrard and her new musical partner Pieter Bourke have contributed significantly to the critically acclaimed hit the Insider. In both movies, Gerrard’s haunting and beautiful voice temper the other components of the film with an elegant, ancient, and exotic texture. But while in the Insider her music consisted entirely of previously released songs mixed well with the traditional score, in this film she is allowed to compose new and original music that flows seamlessly with Hans Zimmer’s score.

Beyond Gerrard’s contributions lies the traditional textures of Hans Zimmer. Known for his own blend of exotic textures and bombastic, adrenaline-pumping orchestral power chords, Zimmer performs up to expectations in Gladiator. Especially cool, though, is his quoting of a theme from Gustav Holst’s Mars. This is especially appropriate in the context of the film, as it appears when Maximus, the Gladiator goes into battle (Mars – Roman god of war).

For those purists out there who normally wait until AFTER seeing the movie to buy the soundtrack, the list of events on the back of this CD don’t give away too much (unlike NUMEROUS other scores…Phantom Menace, for example). But, if you insist on waiting, then run out to see the film on Friday and proceed immediately afterward to buy this wonderful soundtrack.

Iron Chef

Posted on May 01, 2000

My life is complete now that I’ve discovered the wonderful, exciting, and audacious show that IS the Iron Chef. That’s right, not just the Iron Chef…the Iron Chef. This show, which originates from the country that brought us Pokemon, cool fighting video games, and vegetable tempura, defies succinct description…but here goes.

The premise of the show is that a food connoisseur (Chairman Kaga) decides to build an arena for the world’s top chefs to come and compete for their honor. To represent him in battle, Kaga finds the top four chefs of four major cuisines (French, Chinese, Japanese, and Italian). He bestows the title of Iron Chef to them, and finds opponents from around the world to challenge their skills in the Kitchen Stadium.

Whew…I told you it wasn’t succinct…Iron Chef is part sporting event, part cooking show, and part Mortal Kombat. It airs on the Food Network Friday and Saturday at 10pm and 1am and on Sundays at 7:00pm. Tune in, watch, and cheer for your favorite Iron Chef.

Erin Brockovich

Posted on May 01, 2000

I must admit that I wasn’t terribly excited going into the showing of Erin Brockovich. Patrick’s uncle received 4 free passes to attend any movie at the grand opening of a new movieplex in the area. I arrived separately about an hour early, having just finished my last final, to find a parking lot FULL of cars. So, after meeting up with Patrick and his aunt and uncle, we decided to go see U-571. However, we soon discovered that this movie was already full of people (45 minutes prior to the show), so we had to find something else.

While navigating around the numerous old people and hooligans who were assaulting the food vendors for their “complimentary” snacks, we stumbled across the theater showing Erin Brockovich. At first, I was hesitant to sit down because I didn’t want to sit through 2 hours of Julia Roberts. But we couldn’t find 4 contiguous available seats, so Patrick and I left the theater to explore our other options.

We quickly returned to the theater after realizing that the crowd in the lobby hadn’t diminished (30 minutes prior to the show). The theater was hot, noisy, and FULL of people eating their complimentary lunch-bag of popcorn and thimble of soda. Ugh…

Still…after all that…I’m really glad that we stayed and watched Erin Brockovich. This was the first film where I actually stopped thinking of Julia Roberts AS Julia Roberts. Rather, she becomes a believable Erin…she actually emotes concern, anger, and even caring. Beyond that, the lines that she had were very well crafted, expertly delivered, and immanently quotable. The other characters in this story were refreshingly distinct and realistic; the plot was also straightforward and believable. These are important qualities of a movie based on a true story, but not always found in such endeavors.

The Penis Bookby Joseph Cohen

Posted on March 01, 2000

The Next Best Thing

Posted on March 01, 2000

Pieces in a Modern Style by William Orbit

Posted on March 01, 2000

You’ve heard the name, but probably don’t know from where. William Orbit’s most noteworthy sucess thus far has been as producer and cowriter of Madonna’s Ray of Light, but he is by no means “new to the scene” of electronica. His newest album Pieces in a Modern Style is arguably his big break into the world of pop music; however, after listening to a few tracks on the CD, many listeners may feel disappointed. The only reason for this is THIS IS NOT A DANCE ALBUM.

If you like the upbeat, fast-paced techno so often overplayed in clubs, then you’ll like the two tracks on the remix CD included with this album. The main body of this work, however, is not for the passive listener…that is, unless you just want to relax or fall asleep. This album is, however, a superb work of electronica that deserves the critical acclaim it has so far received.

Orbit tries on this album to synthesize the classics of orchestral and choral music with the world of modern electronica, a technique that has been done before by such greats as Carlos, Tomita, and Dorsey. Though this fusion of electronic and classical is nothing innovative, Orbit does it in such a way as to breath new life into the works. He does not attempt to rework them, but rather perform them with new instruments. In this manner, Pieces in a Modern Style demonstrates both the timelessness of the works and the artistry and genius of William Orbit.